Decoding the Facebook: October Week One!

We help you figure out what your friends are really trying to say!

Christian Krauspeby Christian Krauspe

Are you suffering from obscure Facebook status updates from your friends and family? Want to get the bottom of what your friends are really trying to say? Well, worry no more. We here at CRAVE Online have invented a helpful little guide to help you figure out what your friends and family are really trying to say.

This week we took to the internet and found you some Facebook status updates that were in dire need of being decoded. This is CRAVE ONLINE's DECODING THE FACEBOOK SERIES. 

 

What they're really trying to say: I just spent three hours trying to explain the plot of Looper to my Grandpa. I'd like to loop the shit out of him. 

 

What they're really trying to say: We diagreed that the price of an HJ. I believe firmly that those little digits come into play highly during the final moments. 

 

What they're really trying to say: This is my subtle way of telling my past sexual partners about my genital lice. 

What they're really trying to say: Life happens pretty fast. One day you're working at the check-out line at Target and the next day you have a baby and are working at the check-out line at Target. 

 

What they're really trying to say: I have Tony Romo on my fantasy football team and I can't pay someone to take him. It's not my fault he blows worse than Lindsay Lohan after a visit to the Grey Goose factory. 

 

What they're really trying to say: I'm giving Dexter one last season to get good again before I start making my own homemade version. 

 

What they're really trying to say: I thought things would change after Uncle Steve died, but it looks like it never will. 

 

What they're really trying to say: Does anyone know where I can take the Mitt Romney reality tour? 

 

What they're really trying to say: Life is balance. I owe $100,000 dollars in student loan dept. Surely the goverment will step in and do the right thing…

 

Tune into CRAVE every week for more DECODING THE FACEBOOK!