7 Heavy Metal Kids

Burn those Kidz Bop CDs. Long live Metal!

Geoffrey Goldenby Geoffrey Golden

These kids will take you to school. Metal School. It's a lot like School of Rock, only the children there would sacrifice Jack Black to their Vice Principal… Satan! Check out these 7 hardcore kids who rock out to the all-mighty metal:


"My First Hardcore Song"

But hopefully not her last!


Nintendo 64

This kid knows how to celebrate f***ing Christmas!



Super scary kid, ya?


Pokemon Cards

Wait for it…


The Reaper

You've got to start your metal band early. Colleges look for that kind of thing.


Baby Loves Metal

His destiny is to be king of the mosh pit.



Sings a song by Black Sippy Cup. Er, Sabbath.


Geoffrey Golden is the Editor In Chief of The Devastator, the national comedy magazine for geeks.