Roommates Suck

Can't live with them, can't live without them... literally.

Kyle Krinerby Kyle Kriner

We're not all loaded.  Some of us are forced to share space with others like we're still in college, simply because it is financially the only way to get by.  Some of you lucky yuppies will never have to deal with the pressures of living closely with other adults day in and day out.  So I thought I would give you an idea of what this sort of life is like.  This is not targeted at my roommates specifically, this is general.  Besides, my roommates are too dumb to read anyway.  Kidding!

Dealing with other people's opinions is something I don't really enjoy doing unless we're in a good conversation about something.  But when living with others, their opinions are viciously shoved down your throat on a constant basis.  It's really not cool when you have to look around you before picking up the remote to make sure no one else is gonna say something.  Even if I could afford cable TV (I currently just watch Netflix on my TV) I wouldn't buy it.  Channel surfing can be fun, but could you imagine doing it with two other people around?  They could literally channel surf forever. So when you get bored with that and ask to watch something, they finally decide that they're going to stay on one channel.  Oldest trick in the book.

I don't know about you, but when I see people sleeping, I try to tip toe around like a ninja.  I keep lights off, I turn the volume way down if something is on.  Basically I'm not a complete A hole.  Too many times I have been just barely starting to drift off to sleep, when someone comes barreling through the door like a bull in a china shop.  I unfortunately live in a studio so there is no escape.  They come in, they talk to each other, they turn lights on, prepare food, turn a movie on.  At this point, sleep is not going to happen for me.  Maybe I'm a bit sensitive but all of these things keep me up, or at least keep me annoyed enough to stay awake.  Another zombified day at the workplace is always fun.

I always valued my privacy, but at this point, I cherish it like gold.  If I come home from work to an empty house, I practically slide across the floor in my boxers.  I can watch what I want, use the computer for anything I'd like, or just lay in silence and relax.  It doesn't usually last very long, so I enjoy it to the fullest.  Because once your roommates come home, the fun is over.  Hearing footsteps and keys jingling outside the door makes my heart stop every time.  Which is weird because I am friends with my roommates.  But sometimes you just need time for yourself.

Space has never been a big problem for us, somehow we make it work pretty well.  The rest of my issues are more like pet peeves that I would rather not deal with.  Things like one or both roommates having full songs as their text message ringtones, so every time they get a text (every five seconds) I have to hear that song.  Or an alarm that keeps going off, but someone keeps hitting snooze.  Yes, thank you, I didn't get to hear it the first five times it went off.  I don't have to wake up when you wake up, maybe you should set the alarm for a later time if you don't want to get up yet!  Or when someone feels like leaving things lying everywhere or not cleaning something disgusting that should have been common sense to take care of.  How about when you have to label groceries you buy so no one else eats them?  What kind of home is this??  If you didn't buy it, it's not yours.  Guess we can't go by good faith around here.

Believe me, living with others is a character building experience, but if you can afford to live alone, why even bother doing it?  I wouldn't recommend it.  Someday I too plan to live in the silence of an apartment with no other occupants.  Ahhh, someday…